Swings, Roundabouts & Domestic Waterworks

I have now been in this flat for just over three months and I must say that I am really quite enjoying being here. It enjoys an excellent location - The River Thames is a short distance away and Reading town centre is just a bit beyond that. The flat itself is spacious enough and cosy and it meets my needs quite handsomely. But with every flat I have ever lived in, the greatest joys and sorrows are usually related in some way to the domestic waterworks.

Caversham Lock - a lovely location

Take the flush. British toilets have long had a poor reputation. There are few things more irritating than a pathetic flush. My flat in Liverpool suffered from this in a spectacular way. It expended as much energy as a one-legged sloth with emphysema - not so much a flush as a gentle stirring of the contents of the bowl. It clearly had an issue with adding effluent into the sewage system - a porcelain paranoia as it were - and there was, as a result, much pumping and gnashing of teeth. But as is often the case, domestic waterworks obey the rule of averages and I am so pleased that my new flat is a one-flush wonder.

Efficient log removal appreciated

In fact, this toilet has the power to eject even the most stubborn of arm-sized lavatorial abominations. It is an absolute delight - one simple action, no repeats necessary. But the law of averages not only works across the various flats (inter-flat), but also within the flats (intra-flat). I am a tea man. I fill the kettle many times a day to feed my tannin addiction and that requires the cooperation of the kitchen cold water tap. What a git! The water will eventually reach a suitable pressure, but due to whatever (don't ask me, I'm not a plumber), it takes several thousand revolutions of the tap before it achieves any decent level of flow. I want tea, not Carpal Tunnel Syndrome. I am sure that it could be adjusted, but that would involve contacting the landlord, which is beginning to sound like too much effort already.

Add one lump or two and stir gently

So there you have it. Swings and roundabouts. What the waterworks gives with one hand it takes away with the other. I know, I know - this is Britain and I am renting after all. I suppose that the benefits of the muscular flush just about outweigh the inconvenience of the dribbling tap, so I should be grateful to the universe for that. Still, is it really too much to ask that I should have it all? Well, is it?