Hague - 'Britain means business in Libya'

World Statesman, William Hague, has stepped up the pressure on Libya's Colonel Gaddafi by single-handedly passing a UN resolution creating a No-Fly Zone over Libya.

"If nobody else will do it, I will" claimed an angry Hague, who passed the resolution by himself despite apathy from the rest of the world. "It's time to roll our sleeves up and show Mad-man Gaddafi just who is boss".

Hague - "I'll do it myself"

Support for Hague came from an unexpected quarter when Sir Tonald Blair backed him. "You don't mess with Hague", claimed an enthusiastic Blair. "He reminds me of me", Blair continued, "strong, decisive and right".

Blair - 'enthusiastic'

However, Hague hasn't achieved universal backing from every part of the political spectrum. Former Liberal Democrat leader, Charles Kennedy, agreed that Hague was a giant on the world stage, but pointed out that the UK is not equipped to enforce the resolution. "We haven't got any armed forces these days. What are we supposed to use to enforce this no-fly zone?"

Kennedy - 'hangover'

Tonight, what remains of the RAF has been preparing to relocate to Italy in order to patrol the skies over Libya. The UK is deploying its fleet of Sopwith Camels, fully equipped with bricks and grenades, in order to teach Gaddafi a lesson he will not forget. "We mean business", maintained a defiant Hague. "We'll be sending both of our planes."

RAF - Ready for action